Friday, March 28, 2008

I still like ZOMBIES...

How pirate/ninja of me!

Where I stand on Ivanka Trump --->


Thursday, March 27, 2008


I realize it's hideous behavior to toss out words like - "hate", "duplicitous", "cowards". It's fishy! I KNOW I could grab a mirror. Also, it's rather gruesome to be unimpressed with people who may or may not be carrying around guinea pigs or to smugly throw Glen Campbell under the bus.


There are at least SEVEN things that I adore about New York.

And I'm learning day by day how to embrace a better bitter optimism.

So, if you would kindly excuse me my little "moment" there...

I will try to quietly focus all of my forthcoming, bit-lipped, fury on these two ===>

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

I Hate New York

New York = Duplicitous Cowards

(Edit to clarify---> I'm looking straight at you MTA guy from last night.)

and money

(A $40.00 cab ride?)


I should have moved a long time ago.


Regardless... For the sake of my own amusement - I will share with myself another dream ---> for the records.

I was in a bookstore. It seemed very much like the Union Square - Barnes and Noble.
Real time, as usual. I found some very beautiful Special Edition hardbacks. Compilations of all great childhood classics. Stunning.

I noticed, incidentally, a girl walking around with a Guinea Pig under her arm.

No big deal. I wasn't impressed or surprised.

Real time. Still perusing.

I, incidentally, noticed three more random people with Guinea Pigs.

Curiouser... and curiouser. But, I still didn't care.


I saw a Guinea Pig stranded on a table, near checkout.

I went to help him, in case he fell. I was worried that he was just left alone. Small, sweet, dumb, alone, on a table.

When I went to pick him up...

It turned.

It was horrifying.

It was painful.

It was Real Time.

That Guinea Pig was going to kill me.

God. Help. Me.

I was ripped to shreds by this animal.

To the tune of ---> Classical Gas.


Of all the was Glenn Campbell's in my dream.

Edit to note:
"To see a guinea pig in your dream, represents your need to be more responsible and attentive. Alternatively, it suggests that through experimentation and taking risks, you learn how and how not to do something." (some online dream dictionary)

One of these is true. I mean I was really, really, really into those children's books.

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

I'm here for this --->

I'm truly, truly sorry if you can't "get through" it.

Someone who has had ZERO success in being a woman, and remarkably LESS success in being a bitch, an immigrant, or an African American.



Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Never discuss politics. Just toss out light thoughts on the weather.

I finally, understand this idea.

I feel like some kind of grumpy, old, prejudiced, bastard.

If you haven't been doing your homework - I'll know.

And I'll JUDGE you.

This is not an exciting race.

This is f*#@ing serious.

Sunday, March 16, 2008

When We Aren't Playing Scrabble...

Schnabel: I've been living with a lot of negativity for the past 15 years, but it never impacted on my work, or my way of working. It's like a rhinoceros with birds shitting on its back. It stopped me getting comfortable but it never worried me.

A. Randall: Nothing like a bathrobe. Did I tell you about my dream that I had twins, but they were Mexican, and some sort of Skink? You know, that kind with a head the same as it's tail?

Schnabel: I dream about art, and images come to me in dreams. I am definitely hoping to be in touch with my subconscious. I expect a call any minute.

A. Randall: Ring...Ring... Just kidding. Yeah. Not funny. At all. Forget it. Hey, can I borrow another bathrobe? This one's a little grubby.

A. Randall: Much better!

Schnabel: Some people must go to extremes to get the world in balance for themselves. Some can't bear bright lights, so wherever they go they search for the dark; they turn the lights down, anything to sustain some level of comfort.

A. Randall: Oh! Wow! Is that a "Monk style"? Uni-dyed, single ply, extra large hood, full length, 2 patch pockets, adjustable sleeve length with turn back cuffs, wide self fabric belt, 5 pounder?

Schnabel: Jealous?

A. Randall: Ahahhahhhahahahahhahahhahhaaaaahhahhaha! Heeeehehehhhhhhhehackhackhack-hack...

A. Randall: This is nice. We match. Well, not really...but we complement each other. Do you ever wonder what it's like to just blend in?

Schnabel: I paint paintings because I can't get the experience in any other way but there are many more experiences that are equally satisfying to me and equally inept at answering all my questions, but hover in exactitude in describing themselves and defying me to define their logic.

A. Randall: Hmmm. Yeah. What was the question?

Schnabel: It's a great excuse and luxury, having a job and blaming it for your inability to do your own art. When you don't have to work, you are left with the horror of facing your own lack of imagination and your own emptiness. A devastating possibility when finally time is your own.

A. Randall: I've totally memorized all of the two-letter words! Are you proud?! Look: Ro; noun- an artificial language for international use that rejects all existing words and is based instead on an abstract analysis of ideas. Ti; noun- a drink with jam and bread. Re; noun- a shortened form of retard.

A. Randall: Throw it!!! Over here! Pass! Oh yeah, you never did ask me who I was voting for.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

It's Simply Not THAT Bad.

Edit: But this is better.

Patterson Bear -

I really have very little idea about this or what it stands for...

BUT ---->

It is certainly the most adorable creature I have ever laid eyes on.

The Norwegian Steinbeck - Knut Hamsun. (And Where We Take Another Look At Whistling)

Alice In Wonderland(1865) will always be my favorite book. Flaws and all *. The Annotated Alice(1960) - my most valued.

Konrad Lorenz, despite personal socio-political missteps, has grabbed my very insides with his work - particularly King Solomon's Ring.(1949)

"The competition between human beings destroys with cold and diabolic brutality..." (Civilized Man's Eight Deadly Sins, page 45)

You can read many, many books in your lifetime. Most are good for the purpose of passing time. And that is a generous and kind "good", to be sure. But there are a very few, even from beloved and unmatchable writers, that stick to your gut and elevate the very truth of your own, claimed life.

Books written that live as you have lived them.

There's a visceral incarnation which indeed transcends time and space. You, yourself, know this world. You know it. It's era is incidental, as is it's peculiar context.

There is something in everything Steinbeck writes, without fail, that brings me to a core place.

East of Eden(1952), expressly, is more familiar to me than any of my own waking days... checked off, and fully lived.

I had read Knut Hamsun before - Hunger(1890)- and it did touch me... to a point. I hadn't made the connection to Steinbeck, however, before Growth Of The Soil (1920).

(Hamsun had eerily similar socio-poltical missteps congruent with Lorenz. Both men were loosely, unfortunately, momentarily, and wrongly marked as Nazi sympathizers.)

Knut- The Norwegian Steinbeck. Who'd have thought?

(Knut's first published novel preceded Steinbeck's by nine perhaps, Steinbeck is the American Hamsun.)

Growth Of The Soil, I dare say, is the most perfect novel I have ever read. It is simple. It is hilarious. It is timeless in it's insight. Perfect.

So - it tips into first place. It beats East of Eden. It completely beats Alice.
(I easily distinguish perfect from favorite.)

A beautiful passage from Book Two:

Growth of the Soil By Knut Hamsun: "Brede Olsen comes by on his way up trouble on the line no doubt after yesterday"
Growth of the Soil By Knut Hamsun: "thought and tries to work his way out from under the tree Brede must be coming by on his way down before long he thinks to himself and gives himself a breathing space He does not let it trouble him much at first it was only annoying to lose time at his work there is no thought in his mind of being in danger let alone in peril of his life True he can feel the hand that supports him growing numbed and dead his foot in the cleft growing cold and helpless too but no matter Brede must be here soon Brede did not come The storm increased Axel felt the snow driving full in his face Ho tis coming down in earnest now says he to himself still never troubling much about it all ay tis as if he blinks at himself through the snow to look out for now things are beginning in earnest I After a long while he gives a single shout The sound would hardly carry far in the gale"
Growth of the Soil By Knut Hamsun: "thick Axel is getting snowed up himself The snow packs all innocently all unknowing about his face melting at first till the flesh grows cold and then it melts no longer Ay now tis beginning in earnest He gives two great shouts and listens His ax is getting snowed up now he can see but a bit of the haft Over there is his basket of food hung on a tree if he could but have reached it and had a feed oh huge big mouthfuls And then he goes one step farther in his demands and asks yet more if he only had his coat on it is getting cold He gives another swinging shout And there is Brede Stopped in his tracks standing still looking toward the man as he calls he stands there but for a moment glancing that way as if to see what is amiss Reach me the ax here will you calls Axel a trifle weakly Brede looks away hurriedly fully aware now of what is the matter he glanc"
Growth of the Soil By Knut Hamsun: "which Brede must see to without delay He moves off and is lost to sight in the driving snow Ho well and good But after that well it would just serve things generally right if Axel were to manage by himself after all and get at the ax without help from any one He strains all the muscles of his chest to lift the huge weight that bears him down the tree moves he can feel it shake but all he gains by that is a shower of snow And after a few more tries he gives up Growing dark now Brede is gone but how far can he have got Axel shouts again and lets off a few straight forward words into the bargain Leave me here to die would you like a murderer he cries Have ye no soul nor thought of what"
Growth of the Soil By Knut Hamsun: "reckon with too his beard is freezing soon his eyes will freeze too as well ay if he had but his jacket from the tree there and now his leg surely it can t be that but all the same one leg feels dead now up to the hip All in God"
Growth of the Soil By Knut Hamsun: "He must have slept he is all stiff and lifeless now but his eyes are open set in ice but open he cannot wing nor blink has he been sleeping with open eyes Dropped off for a second maybe or for an hour God knows but here"

* The flaws of Alice are matters of taste, and to my mind they are precisely those which make delightful - "The terrible mixture of suffering and cruelty and rudeness and false logic and traps for the innocent." (Collected Papers of Bertrand Russell, 521-529) The unresolved cruelty and nonsense, and Alice's struggles to adapt and learn from them, are also what I (we) love.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

If this isn't TRUE LOVE -

It doesn't matter.


Dave is IN LOVE with Martha.

Martha is IN LOVE with Dave.


I believe!

Tuesday, March 11, 2008


Do I actually have some kick-ass cowboy cousins out there somewhere?!

Monday, March 10, 2008

In The Heights!

Saturday, March 08, 2008

Left Brain? Right Brain?

Maybe you've seen this!

But. I could watch it forever.

(And I will.)

If you see her spinning clockwise, you are more right-brained.

If you see her spinning counterclockwise...more left-brained.

You can control it yourself, switching her rotation back and forth using a touch of interruption.

Switch focus...sinusoidal projection.

Friday, March 07, 2008

Here's what you won't find me doing:

Pretending NOT to be excited about The Return Of Jezebel James.

If it's 1/16th as good as Two And A Half Men*, I'll still be glued.

* Two And A Half Men is RAWTHER bad.

Sweet Dreams!

Two nights ago, I dreamed that I was teaching Dr. Phil how to kayak.

Last night, I dreamed that I was a guest on Tyra. I was there as an expert on stress disorders. After the show, we ate in her cafeteria and I was too short to reach any of the food because it was designed for super-tall people. I was also dismayed by how dirty and gross the food was.

I'll bet tonight I go gun shopping with Martha or something.

Thursday, March 06, 2008

When Hillary Looks In The Mirror, What Does She See?